The nasty "B" word... BOUNDARIES!
Boundaries are not instinctual, they are not natural, but they might hold the quality within which hosts the most import attributes to maintaining healthy relationships with ourselves and our loved ones. Somehow our boundaries can be the invincible barrier that actually leads us to the deepest connection.
The truth however it is in our nature to be like energetic tail-wagging puppy dogs who are eager to run up to each other, sniff, touch, lick and rub our fuzzy butts on "our new best friend," AKA the stranger we just met in our hotel elevator. It seems at times that the only reason we don't just grab them and make out with their face and instead just barely give a shy glance before rushing to our hotel room to rub one out is that there is a learned trifecta between socialization, civilization and our inherent fears that are usually birthed from our past traumas.
The definition of a boundary is knowing where I end and you begin. An imaginary border that is easily blurred like a dirt road in the forest; it will be quickly over grown if it isn’t maintained. Our maintenance comes in the form of introspection, communication and respect. The challenge is that when we don't have them or use them, we are giving a piece of ourselves for the sake of the other person and perhaps at the demise of our own greater good.
Boundaries are a theoretical energetic circle that is filled with the knowing and understanding of our own distinct and unique emotional needs. Of course, the more clarity we have on the way we want to feel and the ways in which we want to be treated, the more our sphere sparkles. This invented circle is placed around the body and those who do not appreciate our limits, wants, needs and requests are disrespectful and the circle enlarges the more harmful or dangerous that person becomes to the life experiences we wish to have for ourselves. So once we know what we want we can truly begin to keep dangerous people and situations further from our homes and further from our hearts.
Here are 3 EASY steps towards maintaining healthy boundaries
(1) know them
(2) communicate them
(3) respect them
Today my heart goes out to all the mental health professionals who have lost a client to suicide. My heart grieves for you. How many times have you put your clients needs before your own? I want you all to know that I see you for your inherent care giving qualities and admire your dedication to the war on brain health, you are doing God's work. Please know that I stand by you as your greatest advocate; my wish is for you to remember that you too deserve to have time to grieve and of course, deserve to have healthy, sparkling boundaries. And never forget, that even in tha darkness of your grieving, your life is still glorious.
Love, Aleksei CEO of Mourning Glory
P.S. My cup runnith over with gratitude to share these kind of words on a platform where we are living in a more understanding world where we are openly discussing these matters. It's our time to have "the Conversation." This is just the beginning and it's a very exciting and inspiring time. Thank you for reading. Please share. Big kiss.