Welcome to the Club Nobody F*cking Asked For: A Suicide Loss Survivor's First Aid Kit 

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By Aleksei Archer

Founder of Mourning Glory Club

email mouringgloryclub@gmail.com for a FREE consultation

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Because What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Weird AF

Introduction: So Your Life Just Got Derailed...

Welcome to the club nobody wanted to join. My condolences for your loss though I’m glad you’ve found us. If you're reading this, your life probably feels like a dumpster fire right now and I get it. Take it from me… when I lost my father, Jeremy, to suicide in 2017 I felt like I was trapped in an infinite abyss of nothingness where I was riddled in guilt, shame, regret and bad hair days.

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I can’t go any further without taking a moment and give a shout out to my homie, grief, for giving me the character development I DIDN’T ask for! But hey… I’m grateful I get to be here sharing what I’ve learned with you now so…

Congratulations! You've survived the unsurvivable, and you're still here, even if "here" feels like rock bottom's basement. Here are a some quick tips and tricks that will give you permission to feel what you’re feeling and know that all those icky yucky feelings are perfectly normal and hey, someday you might even heal from this mess.

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The Five Things Everyone's Too Afraid to Tell You

1. Your Brain Is Now a Hamster on Crack

• Can't remember your own name? Forgot how to make toast?

• Welcome to grief brain, where your IQ takes a temporary nosedive and simple tasks become Olympic events.

• Pro tip: Write everything down. And I mean EVERYTHING. Future you will thank past you for not trusting that "I'll remember" bullsh*t.

• And IF you wanna take this as an opportunity to also write down your feelings, journaling is extemely helpful to get those dark thoughts out of your head and on to paper. 

2. The "Five Stages of Grief" Can Kiss My A**

• Whoever came up with that neat little package clearly never lost someone to suicide

• Your grief journey is more like a game of Chutes and Ladders designed by Chucky

• Some days you're fine, others you're crying in the cereal aisle. Both are totally valid.​

3. Your Social Circle Is About to Get a Major Upgrade

• Some friends will ghost you faster than your Tinder matches

• Some people just don’t have the tools to support you with your complex grief (and that’s ok… we can!)

• Don’t forget, the people you think you might be able to rely on might not be the people who can hold space for you right now (or ever!)

• Others will show up with wine and zero judgment

• Plot twist: The ones you lose probably sucked anyway

4. The "Why" Game Is Bulls*t

• Your brain will try to CSI this situation to death (no pun intended)

• Spoiler alert: Sometimes there are no answers

• We will never know the full answer to the question “why” because we will never know the full picture of what our person was going through that led them to their final choice

• Trying to figure out why a person you love killed themselves is like trying to back into a known with an unknown so stop haranguing yourself

• Save that energy for something more productive, like screaming into the void (or a pillow… if you have neighbors)

5. You're Not Actually Losing Your Mind

• Even if it feels like your sanity took a vacation to Mars

• That weird laugh-cry thing you do? Totally normal

• Those conversations with your person's photos? Also normal

• The random rage at happy people? You guessed it – normal AF

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Emergency Tools for When Life Really Sucks​

The Grief Walk

This exercise helps process emotions by combining movement with mindfulness.

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How to Do It:

1. Choose a Meaningful Route – Walk somewhere that reminds you of your loved one, like a favorite park or a quiet beach.

2. Set an Intention – Before you start, dedicate the walk to your loved one. Decide to reflect, remember, or even talk to them in your mind. 

3. Engage Your Senses – Notice the sights, sounds, and smells around you. Let nature or your surroundings ground you in the present while allowing grief to move through you.

4. Express as You Go – If you feel like crying, laughing, or speaking out loud, let it happen. You might even pick up a small stone, leaf, or flower as a keepsake. If you're so inclined to write out or audio record your feels, find a comfy spot under and tree and just stream of consciousness spew it OUT! 

5. Close with Gratitude – At the end of your walk, take a deep breath and say a quiet thank you—to them, to yourself, and to the moment. 

This technique allows grief to flow naturally while giving your body and mind space to process emotions.

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The Letter of Compassion Technique for Relinquishing Guilt After Suicide Loss

When someone loses a loved one to suicide, guilt can be one of the most overwhelming and persistent emotions. The "Letter of Compassion" technique can be particularly effective for working through this guilt. Here's how it works:

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1. Write from your loved one's perspective: Create a letter as if it were written by the person you lost, addressing you directly.

2. Include three key components:

   • Unconditional love and understanding

   • Recognition that their decision wasn't your fault

   • Permission for you to live fully without guilt

3. Read it aloud: After writing, read the letter aloud in a quiet, safe space where you can experience your emotions fully.

4. Revisit as needed: Keep the letter accessible and return to it during moments when guilt resurfaces.

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Why This Works

This technique works on multiple levels:

• It helps externalize complicated emotions

• It allows you to access compassion that might be difficult to direct toward yourself

• It creates a tangible reminder that can be revisited during difficult moments

• It helps bridge the conversation that many survivors wish they could have had

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Remember that relinquishing guilt is a process, not an event. Many suicide loss survivors benefit from combining this technique with professional support from therapist or coach who specializes in complicated grief and suicide bereavement.

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What Now?

You've made it this far, and that's not nothing. But if you're thinking "Cool guide, but I need more" we've got you covered.

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WE HELP SUICIDE LOSS SURVIVORS RID THEMSELVES OF

• Guilt

• Shame

• Regret

• The unanswerable question "why?"

• How to let love back into the void left by our lost loved one

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At MourningGlory.com, we offer:

• Weekly online support groups where you can become apart of our community and really get to see how powerful and freeing it is to be an advanced griever 

• One-on-one coaching with our Founder

• The "Phoenix Rising" program (because who doesn't want to rise from the ashes of their old life?)

• Resources that don't make you want to punch a wall

• A community of people who welcome you with open arms, will never judge you and who actually get your dark jokes

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Ready to fast track your healing?

Email us at mourninggloryclub@gmail.com to set up a free to set up a free consultation

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The Fine Print

This guide is just the beginning. Think of it as the trailer to a really messed up movie – your life now. But hey, at least you've got company for the screening.

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Remember: You're not alone, you're not crazy, and you're doing better than you think. Even if "better" means you only cried twice today instead of three times. Progress is progress, folks.

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Because even in the darkness of your mourning, your life is glorious.

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